"My Name is Joe Biden and I'll be your Server"

... Do you know what José does? I’ll tell you what he does, and folks, folks, this is the point I want to make. With his own hands, he sprinkles fresh house-grown rosemary on those potatoes (raises voice to a thundering crescendo), and they are golden brown on the outside and soft on the inside and they are delicious! They are delicious! They are delicious!

Thank you.

Now, folks, I gotta do a table touch on 17 and get some more breadsticks to 26, so I’m gonna wrap up here. But there’s something I want you to think about. I want you to think about something. You, me, José, Lord love him, Donna, Pat . . . we’re in this thing together. We’re in it together. You order the food, I bring the food, you eat the food. . . . That’s America. That’s America. You know, my folks had some ups and downs. ...

The whole damn New Yorker piece is hilarious.